Conversation with my teacher on Vipassana Mediation

KEE: i just finished my VIPASSANA


During vipassana, on the 4th, 5th and 6th day, i have lots dreams.....weird dreams...hehehe


MENG FOONG: it's normal. happen to everyone


KEE: i believe is the process


MENG FOONG: everything you experienced and is experiencing is NOT IMPORTANT. no need to pay attention or to find out why and what.


KEE: i dreamed i witnessed a murder scene..something like tht..then i bcome a detactive..n searching for the murderer..hahahhaha yes...i didnt.... it is kind of bell ringing......the vipassana lot of things, more make sense now....


MENG FOONG: your mind function according to all the inputs that has been accummulated from the past and now. all the dreams that you can remember or cannot remember are just your mind resemble all the inputs from here and there, books, stories, movies, songs, talking, hearing, seeing, tasting, touching, thinking, imagining...


KEE: it is somekind of connector to alots of things..things tht we hv been doing, hearing,..the dhamma 


MENG FOONG: good that you feel you "understand" more now. and everytime you will hear the same dhamma again but you will understand something different.


KEE: yes...so i will definitely go again....coz i believe tht human is very selective towards what we want to hear ...it is out of our control most of the time even though i don want to be like tht..but when the time is right, things tht we should hear will be heard....even we want to hear all, but not the right time, we cant hear it even repeated many many times.... 


MENG FOONG: some people spent one year doing vipassana. very fruitful. you will naturally become "quiet"... nothing to say. because all that you experience is just the mind, and it is not important at all.now you did one course already, you can serve. serving is very fruitful more than doing the course yourself. 

KEE: yeah....will join back next year..then only we will b able to see clearly whether did we apply the technique...10days is to show the technique but whether it is workable or not..it is all on our daily life practice 


MENG FOONG: when you know all the names and forms, good and bad qualities is coming from the mind, and you know all these "experiences" are not IMPORTANT at all because the mind doesn't really exist and it is not YOU, you will be silent. nothing to ask, to say, to be this or that. 


not even "try" to be happy... because there is no unhappiness.bye. have to go now... good night to you.

Becoming Yoga Teacher?

Some who have found their love towards yoga, will somehow found their passion in teaching yoga / becoming a yoga teacher.

I received a call yesterday night that a friend of mine (actually she is a friend of my secondary friend). She has been practicing yoga for years and she found that her passion is more on sport and one of it is Yoga.

She attended some classes in the fitness center which almost lost her interest in yoga as it was merely a physical exercise. But she didn't stop exploring until one day, she attended some classes conducted by western teacher and they are teaching Bikram Yoga. As what she mentioned, Bikram Yoga is a 1 and a half hours session with 26 standard postures all together. That was where she found her love and passion as she finally realized that yoga is not merely some physical exercise or body flexibility, but is more than that.

She has recently quit her job and thought of fully involving herself in becoming yoga teacher. The question now, HOW??? HOW TO BECOME A YOGA TEACHER?

From the conversation that i had with her, she kept mentioning that she is only know BIKRAM YOGA and she is not sure whether it can fit into the market as Bikram Yoga is not so famous in Malaysia. She worried that the yoga that she has learned and the only yoga that she has learned might not the same as what other teachers or studios are teaching. She felt unequipped, lacking of confident, doubting herself and lack of faith.

It was the sharing i had with her:

never doubt the belief and faith you have in yoga or what you have benefited from yoga which is not only physically, but more on the deeper part and meaning of all those postures. 


After all, posture is only posture. So, yoga is yoga. no matter what "TYPE" of yoga you have learned, as long as it makes you understand more about yourself, understand that yoga is not merely body flexibility, it is mind flexibility and many more. then it is the yoga that you are going to share. 


We are NOT teaching!! remember that!! we are sharing... sharing means share WHAT WE KNOW, not what we dont know or share what is it suppose to be, but we have no idea of it. If so, what is the point of sharing. it is not sharing then, it will be imitating.


Everyone has different experience, share what we experienced. that's all.


As a student, we are learning, as a teacher, we are learning too. just that we have one advantage which is able to share yoga with others. different aspect way of learning.

After sharing with her, this is the finding that suddenly popped up:

Have the heart of sharing this good karma with others. At sometimes, we will realize that there is no I AM SHARING. It is just sharing and be it.  At a certain point, we will also realize that in becoming a yoga teacher, Yoga teacher is just a name or a title. It doesn't have any special meaning as it is just a name or a title. Maintain the equanimity towards the name or the title. As such, whether we are yoga teacher or not, whether we are sharing or not, whether how many student in the class, how many student that we are teaching, how big or small the class is, whether student able to accept the way or 'type' of yoga that we are teaching, whether this is the 'style' or 'type' of yoga that other studios or teachers are teaching, same style or different style, IT MAKES NO DIFFERENCE. IT MEANS NOTHING. As such, there will be no more doubt of what we teach or share with others. Because, we are clear of what are we doing.

不过如此

在我们不开心的时候，　一切都好像和我们作对，　每一件事都好像很不顺利。　和朋友诉说时，　朋友都会安慰的说　’不要紧啦，　一切都会过去的。　明天一定会更好的。　雨后就会遇见彩虹的。”　再认真的想想，　这么想，　的确是没错的。　可是，　我们是否遗忘了些什么吗？　不开心，　痛苦背后所带来的教训。人之所以会痛苦，　就是因为该做的功课还没做完，　要上的课，　也还没毕业。人之所以会觉悟，　就是在极度的痛苦上，　用爱来扩大自我，学会放下。人的成长，　就是在痛苦之后，　领悟的教训。　否则，　人是很善忘的。　否则，　就会在同一个错误中，　反复的犯错。　因为，　痛的不够彻底呀！！如果，　下一次，　你还在犯同样的错误，　那么你伤的，　还不够彻底！！想想，　痛苦毕竟不是件不好的预兆啊!

虽然不是容易，　分分钟会迷惑在痛苦里，　逃不出来。这么痛苦了，　还拿来什么心思去观察什么成不成长。　可是，　只要在用心一点点，　就那么的一点点。　一切就会有所不同了。　再深思，　就是那么的一阵子，　往内看，　也不就是一种修行啊！既然有力气承受痛苦，　既然有心思这么和自己过不去，　不如把剩余的力气和心思去坦然和坦诚的学会面对痛苦，　接纳痛苦。毕竟，　是个过程，　成长的过程。　 

相遇

"要重複多少　要積累多少　才能像這樣彼此的相遇"

很感激一切发生的， 没发生的， 还没发生的

相处了一阵   思念  比起之前的   潇洒得多了

总算肯放下一点点吧？

有点不可思议的感觉    

地球上有那么一个你

你是存在的

还能这样彼此的相遇

还一度以为用爱来滋润你的无奈

无奈的  应该是我吧？

还一度想呵护你受过的伤痕

竟然被你的坦然， 坦诚和信念  感动了

自己   也太自我，太无知了吧？

原来  这样彼此的相遇

不是在试着弥补

不是谁为谁的

更不是填补

原来  这样彼此的相遇

是让我们一起成长

是互相扶持  互相安蔚  

心灵上有个归宿感

让人生变的更完整  更踏实

原来 你就在不远处

我总是相信  也一直都相信
地球的另一个角落
是有那么的一个你

深夜里  也在听我听的音乐
喜欢着  我喜爱的歌手
陶醉在  她动听的歌声里
相信着  不起眼的信念

平时也爱发发呆
习惯性的独来独往
喜欢自由自在的和自己相处
厌倦了失望  还是真的我行我素

爱好看看书
也许在寻找某些答案
也许在寻找某些可能性
也许在寻找某些出路
也许在学习活的更开心一点
也许在学习用不同的角度   把世界变得更漂亮一点点
也许清楚的知道  一切就只是一念之间
也许一直都相信  真爱一直都存在

直到我遇见了你
原来   你就在不远处

难得呀！

" 陷入情网那种相爱的感觉， 只是一种幻觉。 我相信，情侣要等到脱离情网后才能真正相爱， 因为真爱的基础不是一种恋爱的感觉。 真爱发生的时候， 很可能完全没有恋爱的感觉， 爱的行为也不需要恋爱的感觉做后备。 (心灵地图~by M. Scott Peck) "

感觉， 和以往的有差距。 开始时，不明白， 一头雾水。 彷徨无助，陷入了无底洞。 很努力的在往上爬， 却越陷越深。 

没有脸红的感觉， 没有飘飘的感觉， 没有期待的感觉， 没有渴望的感觉， 没有恋爱的感觉。

只知道， 在同一个时间， 同一个空间， 同一瞬间， 分享的平静， 分享的思维， 分享的默契，感觉很踏实， 很踏实。

不追求什么未来， 就在这当下。 

无境的遗憾， 无诉的无奈， 如今埋下了无止境的感恩。 人生有几回， 能遇见真爱。 要修多少世福， 才能这么的爱着。 

不挽求回爱， 不渴求相爱。 这么爱着， 就足够了。 原来爱， 是可以这么的广阔。 原来这么的去爱， 也是幸福的。难得！

选择

现在的我， 有种安详的感觉。有如大浪以后，平息的海洋。 还有一丝丝的牵挂， 一阵阵的沮丧。 有人说‘痛苦会让人更坚强， 忧伤会让人更有诗意， 变得不肤浅’。

沮丧不是因为结束，只因为要放弃。放弃的， 不是那段情。  放弃的， 而是自我。 放弃的， 而是过去处事与看事的方式。

不会哭的我， 渴望痛哭一场。 让眼泪带走心里的不愉快。这样，很快的， 就会痊愈了。越想要的，越艰难。 毕竟，这是一个经历，这是必修的功课，这是必上的一堂课。

可能是心灵成长的一种阶段吧。 也学会明白， 痛苦是心灵成长的机会。

不再强求了， 不再渴望了。 不哭， 就不哭。 学不会放下， 就不需要放下。 不舍得放弃， 那就不放弃了。 毕竟爱， 不是占有。 毕竟爱， 不是一定要在一起。 毕竟爱， 不是一定要拥有。 而爱，应该像 M. Scott Peck所说的‘爱， 是为了滋长个人和他人心灵成长， 一种发乎真诚意愿的行动。’

他也说了‘做自己的主人。 出於我自己的抉折，抉折的后果也该由自己负责。’ 这是我的选择， 这是我的自由。我选择不哭了，我选择不放下了， 我选择不放弃了， 因为我学习不再和自己过不去了。 我也选择，这样爱你的方式。